Some people seem to have better lie-detecting skills than others, and some people are better liars than others as well. Knowing how to spot when someone is lying to you can make life a lot easier now, and having that skill can also be very beneficial in a crisis or survival situation.
Fortunately, we humans are creatures of habit, and this is one of the reasons that we often express or do things unconsciously. Most people often produce subtle signs or say things that can indicate when they are not being honest. While picking up on some of these cues may require a little bit of training, practice and experience, there are others that are easier to notice. Here are a few examples of common, tell-tale signs that someone may be lying.
Distancing
Imagine a child accidentally dropping your favorite coffee mug on the floor. You walk into the room, ask what happened, and they may say something like, “look, you’re cup is broken.”. This is one of the most-basic defense mechanisms that people use to try and eliminate themselves from the equation. They try to over-compensate with being objective and factual in an attempt to convince the other person that they had nothing to do with the situation at hand. Unfortunately, this type of statement is used all the time in daily life, so it’s important to be able to contextualize the situation before assuming that someone is being dishonest.
Negativity or Blaming Others
It’s common for people to blame others or make negative comments about a situation in order to try and convince someone of their stories. They also use this tactic as a form of of masking subconscious guilt. For example, someone who is pretending to be stuck in traffic may over-state the situation by blaming everyone else for causing the problem, or they may swear a lot or use other forceful words. They may also get very negative in their talking as a way to try and convince you that they are just as upset as you are. Someone who is being honest may blame others if others are responsible for something, but they will usually do it without all of the negativity associated with a liar’s explanation.
Simple Explanations
A common misconception is that liars tend to be overly-detailed as they try to construct believable stories. However, the opposite is true more often than not. Liars don’t like details because it is difficult to remember them as they keep repeating the story. Instead, their answers may be concise and brief, and they will also avoid going into details when pressed for more information. They also tend to feign ignorance or surprise instead of just admitting the truth.
Unnecessary Details
For those who do give complicated answers to reinforce their lies, they will often go into amazing detail along the way. They may also hesitate as their brain tries to catch up with their mouths as they explain themselves as well. If you are talking with someone who is answering a question by getting buried into details, and it looks like they are thinking hard along the way, chances are they are not being all that honest with you.
Complicated Wording
People tend to speak differently when they’re lying. They may use more formal words, or they may construct their sentences in unusual ways. This is particularly easy to notice if you know the person who is lying as you can tell the difference, but it’s also something easy to pick up when listening to a lesser-known individual as well. The speech just won’t seem natural when they’re telling you their story, and this is a good warning sign to be aware of.
Most average people, or those who are not skilled liars, will demonstrate one or more of these behaviors as they are talking with you. The trick is to hone your skills through practice in order to be able to tell the difference with increasing accuracy. However, as helpful as these are, nothing replaces trusting your instincts and following your gut when listening to what people are telling you. Try these tricks for yourself, and take time to learn more about other, more-subtle ways to spot a liar. This is one of the best skills that you can develop, and it can go a long way with keeping you out of unwanted trouble when interacting with others.
